Using iPod Shuffle as your own Magic 8-Ball advisory service is nothing new, but it really never grows old. So I figured while I'm off on my 10-day excursion through the northwestern U.S., I'd give you a little mix of songs courtesy of one run through my Magic iPod 8-Ball.
1. How will this whole economic debacle turn out?
Stand By My Woman - Lenny Kravitz
If this is s'posed to mean I should vote for Sarah Palin, then I'm ignoring it, 'cuz she ain't my woman. I think this means we don't give up on Lady Liberty. Or, um, the governmental oversight required to make sure Lady Liberty doesn't turn into a two-bit whore.
Social Disease - Elton John
If we attack the Middle East with a heavy onslaught of Elton, not even the lure of 10,000 virgins could compel them to attack our great country.
3. My girls. What happens with them and us when they become teens?
Home - Simple Minds
At first glance this song title seems perfectly appropriate, but the song itself is kinda disturbing, and I don't like this game anymore. iPod 8-Ball Lesson #1: Don't ask the iPod 8-Ball questions to which you don't really want to know the answers.
4. Will this trip out West be awesome or what?
All My Life - Foo Fighters
I always thought Grohl was saying "Waking me down," like it was a pun on "Waking me up." But apparently he's saying "Weight keeping me down." Seems like a good song for a trip with six different stops along the way -- "Done and I'm onto the next one."
5. What's going to happen in the next season of LOST... if it ever arrives?
A Little Less "Sixteen Candles," A Little More "Touch Me" - Fall Out Boy
This is Kate telling me to get over her already. I'll never have what Sawyer or Jack have.
6. Who holds the key to Greyskull? Who has the power? Where is He-Man in our hour of need?
Grip Like a Vice (Black Affair Remix) - The Go! Team
Maybe She-Ra is the new He-Man. Sarah Palin might not make a great VP, but she'd make a good She-Ra.
All of the above songs are available online and come from albums worthy of your purchasing consideration. Shop around on iTunes or Amazon.com. Please support your musical artists by buying their albums, especially Elton John. That dude needs more money.