Sunday, April 1, 2012

Bottom Of The Glass to become CBS sitcom

Counting Crows--"Mr. Jones" (mp3)
We are very proud to announce that CBS has purchased our Bottom Of The Glass concept and is developing it for a new mid-season replacement sitcom that will air following the Super Bowl next February 8th. The show, tentatively titled Bloggers, will then move to a Tuesday night time slot.

"We pitched it as Seinfeld meets War Games," said the BOTG blogger known as Billy, "and they liked the idea of a show that could be about anything or nothing, with an ongoing backstory of how technology is always getting the two bloggers into trouble and they have to outsmart what they've done to themselves with their computers."

In the show, the two bloggers will lead double-lives as irreverent, cutting edge bloggers who are also high school teachers. "Hilarity ensues," said the blogger known as Bob, "when, each episode, the school officials come close to finding out who the bloggers really are. And they are always in danger of losing their jobs. I actually wanted to pitch the show as Revenge of the Nerds meets that movie where Christian Slater is a pirate radio dj, but I never could remember the name of that movie. And still can't."

In one of the early episodes, students hack into the bloggers' site and threaten to expose them if they don't get to dance however they want to at an upcoming semi-formal, despite new school rules. "It's kind of Footloose meets 24," said Billy, "but funny." In another episode, the bloggers decide to blog live from Bourbon Street during Spring Break, but lose their computer while it is logged in to the site, and they have to search the Bourbon Street establishments one at at time to find out who is posting pictures on their blog, while the school principal who is online back home thinks that he recognizes them. "Hilarity ensues," said Bob. "It's kind of Basic Instinct meets Ferris Bueller's Day Off, but with a lot more skin."

"Technology is sexy right now," said CBS's Vice-President of Situational Comedy Development, Irv Kreutzman. "People would rather spend intimate time with their Ipads and smart phones than with other people. And teaching is sexy again. People working in the noble profession for peanuts and doing the good of society while living from paycheck to paycheck? Are you kidding me? What could be sexier than that? Poor is the new rich."

"The problem is the actual guys are way too old for our demographic, and, frankly, one of them looks like he could be the other one's father. We'll be skewing them in their late 20's/early 30's," the exec continued. "And, Billy will be black."

"Well, I guess I'd imagined Ryan Gosling playing me," Billy said, "You know, exploring the comic thing, which he hasn't done, but if it's Mekhi Phifer or Kenan Thompson, that's still pretty cool. I was a big fan of Kenan and Kel back in the day. And Good Burger. In the theater."

CBS is in talks with Philip Seymour Hoffman to play Bob. "The guy is a genius," said Bob, "He could play Willy Loman or Justin Beiber. And I'm kind of right in the middle."

Because Bottom Of The Glass has always considered itself a music blog first, despite its whimsical blog topics--think Rolling Stone meets Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey--the show will exploit the connection by using a variety of musical guest stars.

"When Nick Hornby trashed Phil Collins and Simple Minds in High Fidelity, he hid behind his character to issue his criticism," said CBS' Kreutzman. "When Bob blogged about how Alejandro Escovedo is a complete asshole after a run-in at a concert, he was out there naked on the Internet. And, guess what? We've got Escovedo booked for the pilot! He couldn't be more excited. He has some things that he wants to say to Bob's character and he gets to play live and we get the Hispanic demographic. And the real Bob will have a guest appearance. As a concept pitch, I call that win meets win meets win meets win. Billy has asked for an episode that features nothing but female crooners like Patti Griffin and Lori McKenna. We're looking at a made-for-Lifetime Network movie for that particular episode."

Other regular characters on the show will be based on "personalities" who comment regularly on the real blog. There will be Fishman, who is always trying to meet his hero, Bruce Springsteen, but who hilariously always comes up short (during the episode when Springsteen comes on the show, Fishman will be in Cleveland worshipping at the Springsteen exhibit at the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame). Another regular, who will keep his name, "John," will be technologically inept and will cause problems for the bloggers because he can never figure out how to read their blog and is, therefore, always a step behind. "He's the Kramer," adds Kreutzman. Real-life female blog commenters Daisy and Beck-Eye will be combined into one character, Daiseye, who will play a role similar to the female lobsterboat captain in The Perfect Storm.

"Yes, there will be love interests, births, deaths, and cross-dressing, all the stuff you'd expect from a sitcom. But basically, this is a story about a non-conformity bromance, better yet, an iBromance, think Of Mice and Men meets One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest plus computers and minus the need for one character to suffocate the other after he's been lobotomized. Two men doing what they love and damn the consequences. It's the American Dream," said Kreutzman.

The real life bloggers have their own dreams as well, as they begin to confront the realities of their new-found fame. "I want us to be a brand," said Billy, "I want to be a comic book and an action figure at Christmas."

"I want to be a salad dressing," said Bob. "I'd like to topple Paul Newman's empire and become the healthy salad dressing for kids in school cafeterias."


troutking said...

Simple awesome. I especially like how you gave the Trout King character a Jewish sounding name. That was a nice touch. L'chaim to your new show! PS Don't blow it like George Costanza by demanding Ted Danson money!

Daisy said...

I simply love every single thing about this post! The "Bloggers" sounds better than 97% of the junk that is currently on tv.

rodle said...

I thought Billy WAS black.